What you really need


Researchers have found that owning a fast car, a large home and having a good job may only make you happy if those around you are less well off.

It’s too easy to compare ourselves with those around us. (And television gives us a chance to make false comparisons: We see what “normal” people have in commercials and in various programs, and we subconsciously begin to want these things too.)

But even if you know that you oughtn’t compare your life with others, it can be tough to exercise self-control. It’s easy to get swept up by materialism, especially if all of your friends are into it. (If they all have iPhones, you want an iPhone. If they all wear expensive clothes, you want expensive clothes.)

You have to make a conscious effort to not care about what they own and do. Instead, focus on your goals and your needs. What you want or need to own shouldn’t be defined by what other people have; it should be based on what you want to do in life, and what brings you intrinsic happiness.

Believe it or not, much of what we “want” is simply society’s desires in disguise. And because many of our desires lack authenticity we often don’t have the motivation necessary to take the steps needed to reach our destination

How do we know if our wants are real or an illusion? You must determine that, by having a conversation with yourself.

Why Do I Want This?

Are you helping someone just so you can get something back? Or are you helping just for the sake of helping? It’s perfectly OK to have personal goals but don’t lie about your motives in the process.

Am I Willing To Put The Work In?

Are you willing to put in the time and effort to make this goal a reality? Will you be willing to sacrifice along the way? Do you want badly enough to give up your weekends?

[via this and this]

Posted in Misc. 2 Comments »

2 Responses to “What you really need”

  1. Wajhi Says:

    Pretty deep stuff Usman.

    My personal thinking is not what I want but What I am here for , Am a simple social animal and just here to fulfill my desires and do my time and die or Is there a greater purpose for me

    Still searching for the purpose….

  2. Hany Says:

    i keep hearing these ideas a lot lately, specially in this minimalistic trending era we are about to start. But, it’s the human nature!
    As we can analyze, most of our basic needs in order to be happy will be the same, aside from those exceptional cases, but human beings are bored quickly by design, in order to evolve, and that will bring them to start trying to be different, all of these tryouts to be distinctive, will evolve our future lifestyles dramatically and will be filtered by what will be most beneficial to us.

    All this can be actually translated to smaller scenarios, like people want to follow other successful stories, and sometimes, they could have misjudged the success attributes of those stories to difference aspects, like many young people try to imitate pop singers by the looks and behavior, ignoring all together the fact that talent and hard work are the soul of those pop singers stories, but people tend to hurry out to be distinct, because they are bored, because they don’t have any other constants to rely their lives on, which is exactly is the MAIN point in here.

    instead of asking what you need first, you should ask, what do you believe in ? is it another person ? is it religion (it should be religion), is it technology ? you don’t know yet ? it’s the main aspect, that you get every morning and can’t shake it from your mind, it’s the main aspect you tend to refer to what ever situation you are having. After you have your constant, i assure you that most of the other issues you may have as an individual or a society, will be resolved by its own, it’s the butterfly effect, just a small basic change, will lead to a whole different kind of life to most of the surroundings.

    Case Study: @iPhones and similar trends: it’s the evolution of technology around us, before that, most people will mock HD TVs arguing about how unnecessary they are, but now, because of the influence of the adapters, it’s the basis of every related technology. similarly for the iPhone, before that, people best effort was blackberries and smart phones, and thank you Sir, i didn’t believe in them or try have a one, because they were constant in their potential, but iPhone has a made revolution, that is clear by the competition around it. Right now, you don’t need to get an iPhone, because you have a variety of other options that equates to its features, but it’s only thanks to Apple for making that possible, and the early people ran behind it! It’s simply evolution, and you are free to jump in or not, but it will touch you some way in your life.

    PS: i still agree with you that people need to think a little before running for every shinny idea others talk about, because simply, we don’t have enough resources to track and cover all of them, but i understand why people are like that, and that’s the difference.

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